NAMASTE CHENNAI

You know you’re in India when:

1. The crew lays down cardboard next to the gangway and makes sure that it covers every square-inch of floor and stair on the entire ship
2. The auto (tuk tuk) drivers take you to at least four pseudo-destinations before finally taking you to the correct one
3. You consume two tablets of pepto bismol every four hours and STILL get traveler’s diarrhea
4. You see the most beautiful and vibrant colored saris everywhere
5. You eat naan 24/7 and wonder how this has not been a staple of your diet for the past twenty one years
6. Cricket tournaments and the national field hockey tournament are televised on every channel
7. People Magazine only has two pages of American stars (Taylor Swift and Celine Dion both made the cut) but hundreds of Bollywood stars… shout out SRK
8. You see men of all ages walking hand in hand down the street
9. There are stray, injured, abandoned, or sick dogs EVERYWHERE
10. You buy countless decorations for your room next year only to realize that everything will have to match the Chinese lanterns and Japanese wall hangings you previously bought...

The Indian adventure began in Chennai, a port in the Bay of Bengal. My trip to the Taj and Jaipur did not leave until the next day so we had the entire first day to explore and more importantly shop. The one downside about the first port was that our ship was not docked close to anything…it was a good mile walk to get to outside the port terminal. Regardless eight of us set out in three autos hoping to get to Perry’s Corner, which we heard and assumed was a market.

A wikitravel quote about the auto-rickshaw drivers in Chennai: “Auto-rickshaw drivers in Chennai do not use meters; they grossly overcharge and often behave rudely and drive rashly. They are happy to exploit foreigners and locals alike.” Fact. The three auto drivers were persistent in wanting to drive us around all day for twenty dollars a person. Besides the fact that this was absurd, we were not completely sure what we would be doing and just wanted to handle things as they came. We asked the drivers to take us to a market, in hopes of finding typical touristy souvenirs. Unfortunately before taking us to a “market” they drove us around Chennai and included auto tours of the St. Thomas Basilica and Elliot’s Beach. After about twenty minutes of being under the control of the auto drivers, we lost two of our friends whose auto driver decided to leave the group and take them elsewhere. Peace out Rachel and Keith. One auto down, the two remaining ones took us to a shady store area that they definitely got commission for taking us to. Luckily Ivy placed down the rupees we owed our driver and we rushed away hoping to escape the drivers who still wanted to stay with us. A little foreshadowing: the auto driver would come back to haunt us later that day.

The six of us, four girls and two boys (don’t worry mom there were boys with us), made our way through the back alleys of Chennai trying to avoid our previous drivers and find some type of market. We hailed new auto drivers and told them to take us to Spencer’s Plaza, an Indian mall with lots of shops which ended up being perfect for shopping. It was after we arrived in the mall and were trying on light cotton pants and such in a store that one of the previous auto drivers found us and started yelling. Apparently the driver of the other auto insisted that he made a deal with his customers and that they each owed him ten dollars for his services. This was insane! A crazy auto driver had not only tracked us down miles away from where we escaped from him but now insisted that we owed him money and were in debt to him. Nice move Ivy in forcefully laying down our money in our rickshaw. To get rid of the crazy driver the boys ended up paying him $35 US dollars. Welcome to India. One thing I learned in India is that you can easily be traced and found.

Once we got past this shock of being found so easily in the most populated country in the world, we continued with our shopping. After that afternoon I was the proud owner of four new pairs of light pants, each costing around $3, the entire series of Friends for $15, and a bunch of pretty cool silk pillowcases. A note about the Friends series- I made the guy test it in his store to make sure the discs worked and even though he showed me a working episode, I got screwed. The discs do NOT work. I guess that’s karma for trying to pay $15 dollars for something that usually costs $400. On the bright side 3 of the 4 pairs of pants (one was just a terrible purchase and I should have known I would never wear them) turned out to be very useful for the duration of my trip.

That night, Brooke, Andrew, and I decided to go out to a local hotel bar. The American consulate reps warned us about drinking Indian liquor because we would apparently be more hungover than we had ever been in our lives if we drank it. The plan of action was to go to a local hotel bar (they’re more upscale, serve to women and men alike, and are more likely of staying open past eleven which is when local bars close) and ask for imported alcohol. A couple martinis, pita and hummus, and bowls of French fries later we found ourselves in the company of about ten other SASers at the “Leather Bar” in the Liberty Park Hotel. Unfortunately being slightly intoxicated and having to wake up several hours later (the Taj Mahal and Jaipur trip met to leave in the Union at 3:30 AM) I had to end the festivities early and head to the ship.

Fun night, rough morning- maybe I did drink the Indian alcohol after all… Hangover aside, I successfully managed to make it to my trip on time. Needless to say once I sat down in the plane I fell asleep immediately and may or may not have held an “air” sickness bag the entire time, just in case.